S0updragon
Well-Known Member
Bits of coin?
made me chuckle
- Thread starter PaulJL
- Start date
PaulJL
0
Police are urging for witnesses to come forward who witnessed the £15,000 robbery at Showcase Cinemas in Teesside on 13th February 2018. Boy racers gathered outside the local cinemas before two lads decided to rob the food counter at gun point. They shortly after sped off in a Astra GTC. They had two girls in the car who looked no older than 18 years of age. We have been informed the lads made off with two bags of popcorn, a large drink and a bag of revels totalling an estimated value of £15,000
PaulJL
0
An unexploded WW1 bomb was yesterday safely detonated on land bordering the peacock estate Wakefield.
News of the disaster was swiftly distributed to all betting offices by the town's 35000 racing pigeons, as victims were seen wandering around aimlessly muttering "What the chuff wer that?" and "Na then, wots guin on?".
The explosion decimated a large area of wasteland causing £30 worth of damage. Locally Several priceless collections of Franklin Mint and mementos from both Tenerife and the Spanish Costa's were damaged beyond repair. Three areas of historical burnt out cars were disturbed in nearby peacock Sounds levels reached an almost unbearable peak during the explosion when an estimated 14,000 Staffordshire Bull Terriers began barking in synchrony.
Many locals were woken well before their Giro arrived. Ridings Fm reported that hundreds of residents were confused and bewildered, still trying to come to terms with the fact that something interesting had happened in Wakefield . One resident, 15 year old mother of three, Tracey Sharon Braithwaite, said, "It was such a shock my little Chardonnay Madonna came running into my bedroom crying. The twins, Tyler-Morgan and Megan-Storm slept through it all. I was still shaking when I was watching Jeremy Kyle the next morning". Locals were determined not to be bowed as looting, muggings and car crime carried on as normal.
So far whilst the British Red Cross has managed to ship 4000 crates of Sunny Delight to the areas to relieve the suffering of stricken locals, rescue workers searching through the flytip have found large quantities of personal belongings including child benefit books, CSA claim forms and jewellery from Elizabeth Duke at Argos, plus bone china from poundstretcher.
Can you help?
Please respond generously to our appeal for food and clothing for the victims of this disaster.
Clothing is needed most of all - especially
* Burberry or Fila baseball caps
* Kappa tracksuit tops (his or hers)
* Shell suits (female)
* White sports socks
* any product sold at Primark
* new dog leads suitable for Staffordshire Bull Terriers
Culturally sensitive food parcels are harder to put together, but your efforts will make a difference. Microwave meals, tinned beans, Netto ice cream and cans of Colt 45 or Special Brew are ideal. Please do not give anything that needs peeling.
Remember
* 22p buys a biro for filling in compensation claims
* £2 buys chips, crisps and a blue fizzy alco pop drink for a family of 9
* £5 will pay for a packet of B & H and a lighter to calm a child's nerves.
Urgently required: Tinned whippet food. Bones for Jack Russells.
Please do not send tents for shelter. The sight of such posh housing will cause discontent in the surrounding community
News of the disaster was swiftly distributed to all betting offices by the town's 35000 racing pigeons, as victims were seen wandering around aimlessly muttering "What the chuff wer that?" and "Na then, wots guin on?".
The explosion decimated a large area of wasteland causing £30 worth of damage. Locally Several priceless collections of Franklin Mint and mementos from both Tenerife and the Spanish Costa's were damaged beyond repair. Three areas of historical burnt out cars were disturbed in nearby peacock Sounds levels reached an almost unbearable peak during the explosion when an estimated 14,000 Staffordshire Bull Terriers began barking in synchrony.
Many locals were woken well before their Giro arrived. Ridings Fm reported that hundreds of residents were confused and bewildered, still trying to come to terms with the fact that something interesting had happened in Wakefield . One resident, 15 year old mother of three, Tracey Sharon Braithwaite, said, "It was such a shock my little Chardonnay Madonna came running into my bedroom crying. The twins, Tyler-Morgan and Megan-Storm slept through it all. I was still shaking when I was watching Jeremy Kyle the next morning". Locals were determined not to be bowed as looting, muggings and car crime carried on as normal.
So far whilst the British Red Cross has managed to ship 4000 crates of Sunny Delight to the areas to relieve the suffering of stricken locals, rescue workers searching through the flytip have found large quantities of personal belongings including child benefit books, CSA claim forms and jewellery from Elizabeth Duke at Argos, plus bone china from poundstretcher.
Can you help?
Please respond generously to our appeal for food and clothing for the victims of this disaster.
Clothing is needed most of all - especially
* Burberry or Fila baseball caps
* Kappa tracksuit tops (his or hers)
* Shell suits (female)
* White sports socks
* any product sold at Primark
* new dog leads suitable for Staffordshire Bull Terriers
Culturally sensitive food parcels are harder to put together, but your efforts will make a difference. Microwave meals, tinned beans, Netto ice cream and cans of Colt 45 or Special Brew are ideal. Please do not give anything that needs peeling.
Remember
* 22p buys a biro for filling in compensation claims
* £2 buys chips, crisps and a blue fizzy alco pop drink for a family of 9
* £5 will pay for a packet of B & H and a lighter to calm a child's nerves.
Urgently required: Tinned whippet food. Bones for Jack Russells.
Please do not send tents for shelter. The sight of such posh housing will cause discontent in the surrounding community
PaulJL
0
A mother-in-law stopped by unexpectedly the recently married couple's house. She knocks on the door, then immediately walks in. She is shocked to see her daughter-in-law lying on the couch, totally naked.
"What are you doing?" she asked.
"I'm waiting for Jeff to come home from work," the daughter-in-law answered.
"But you're naked!" the mother-in-law exclaimed.
"This is my love dress," the daughter-in-law explained.
"Love dress? But you're naked!"
"Jeff loves me to wear this dress! It makes him happy and it makes me happy."
The mother-in-law on the way home thought about the love dress. When she got home she got undressed, showered, put on her best perfume and expectantly waited for her husband, lying provocatively on the couch.
Finally her husband came home. He walked in and saw her naked on the couch.
"What are you doing?" he asked.
"This is my love dress," she replied.
"Needs ironing," he says" "What's for dinner?"
"What are you doing?" she asked.
"I'm waiting for Jeff to come home from work," the daughter-in-law answered.
"But you're naked!" the mother-in-law exclaimed.
"This is my love dress," the daughter-in-law explained.
"Love dress? But you're naked!"
"Jeff loves me to wear this dress! It makes him happy and it makes me happy."
The mother-in-law on the way home thought about the love dress. When she got home she got undressed, showered, put on her best perfume and expectantly waited for her husband, lying provocatively on the couch.
Finally her husband came home. He walked in and saw her naked on the couch.
"What are you doing?" he asked.
"This is my love dress," she replied.
"Needs ironing," he says" "What's for dinner?"
Colin Stewart
Active Member
Watching Scotland v England at rugby. that made me chuckle 
Last edited:
booglissamo
Member
Who mentioned the Chuckle Brothers? lolWatching Scotland v England at rugby. that made me chuckle
BC Sunshine
Active Member
BWAHAHAHAHA!!!
S0updragon
Well-Known Member
How do you get Pikachu on a bus?
Pokemon
Pokemon