just couldn't resist copying this [^]
[}
]
you have definately come to the right place [}
]
You know how when I was at your place last Time
and I overheard you talking to Matilda
well that really does work
after lunch I had a couple of quiet ones sitting in The Van
I mean the Commer van
Lyn and I discussed a name for it and the four we came up with were
1 Wally whippy
2 KiKi-Mull
3 apostrophe or
4 full stop
and I didnt think my commer liked it
because I just drifted of into a daydream and as I was daydreaming
I dreamt the Commer was talking to me
just like you and Matilda Reddo !!!!
and this is what he said !!!
I WILL HAVE YOU KNOW MY GOOD MAN !!!!!
I have a link to Royalty I will have you know
Princess Ann's Daughter was conceived in me
while the royals where on a holiday
I am a first Cousin to Prince Charles Aston Martin and the Queens Rolls Royce's and Bentleys and I will not be having any of this Ooorstralian gutter slang
what Kind of name is KIKI-Mull or full stop or wally Whippy
My real name is Frederick to you my good man Lord Frederick
jeeez i said to my self Self!!!!
is this for real or is this reddo stuff Hallucinations due to the Tooheys extra dry
I mean if your thirsty why would you drink Dry???
so I said listen Mate !!!
Lord Frederick or whatever your name is supposed to be
Consider yourself Lucky you escaped from the last loser that had you
And while Im at it
why were you Transported to Australia
Well its like this
horse head had had a few to many wines
and she left me parked on a hill without my hand brake on on
Any way this massive storm blew up and pushed me forward over this hill overlooking Horse heads Country Residence
Well down I went faster and faster faster
HELP!!!HELP!!!! get out of the Way get out of the way
I was thinking to myself
well straight thought the Royal chook Pen
I killed 37 Japanese silky chooks a present from the emperor of Japan and on top of that I killed the Royal Cock
Ah So you might say
but I just kept going down down straight through the Royal bowling green knocking over the late shift gardener manicuring the green for a visit from the queen and Prince Phillip the very next day
SShhittt!!!!what I meant was ohh my Gosh!!!
3 inch deep truck tyre grooves right through the the centre of the green and an unconscious greens man
and I'm still rolling and heading for the Royal conservatorium glass house which is housing the most rarest of rare pink gladiolas
as I came to Rest among st the rare gladiolas
who else was there but Princess Anne herself and Dame Edna checking out the Gladiolas
Princess Ann lost the plot yelling at the top of her voice take this Bloody Commer van straight to the Royal wrecking yard now immediately do not pass go straight to gaol wreck the bloody thing now !!!!!
Then Dame Edna said
I think this van has got some good old Aussie Larrikin in him
would you mind if I took it home With me
then princess Ann turned to Dame Edna and said
Do what you will with this Van
as from this Day it will no longer be known as or reffered to as
her highnesses royal holiday abode
now get it out of my sight it is all yours dame Edna
I thought to myself you left me out of gear with no handbrake on Horse head
as from this day i quit get yourself another lacky you can bully and make a laughing stock of
so for many years I had a wonderful life frolicking along the roads around Victoria with Dame Edna and her Family
until I was retired and handed on to another family who cherished me
no one wants you when you get old and to betruthfull I just want to go to where all good vans go when you are to old
at that I said to the Commer Van
Listen here Mate !!!!!
I just ordered some Reddo-tel Vin Van rejuvination pills and they arrived just this morning
im going to name you Lord Fred
and im going to restore you to your former Glory Lord Fred because I belong to the Vintage Van group here in Australia
just wait till you see what I can do with the help of Reddo-tel Industries and our amazing group of Vin Van enthusiasts
so I will wack 6 of these in the old oil hole
six in the water tank six in the petrol tank and ill take six and lets see what happens
Just then Lyn comes out and says what are you doing talking to that old Truck
Ahem cough !! er dont worry sweetheart im just going to start on lord Fred
she says Who!!!!
Jeeeeez!!!!!!!dont worry about it Ill explain later
straight in the shed three sanders a heat gun some sand paper and away we go
Reddo now I know what happened you were testing out those new rejuvination pills right !!!
got to go now back to the resto
will
restorer to royalty
ps Reddo can you send some more of them pills
double the dosage
"RAN"the van & N0.1
